When you feel hopeless, reaching another person is a useful next step. You do not need to explain everything clearly or wait until you know why you feel this way. A short message can be enough to start getting support.
If you cannot keep yourself or someone else safe, call 999 or go to A&E in the UK. In England, urgent mental health advice is available through NHS 111; select the mental health option. You can also call Samaritans on 116 123. Outside the UK, use your local emergency or crisis service. These routes are described in the NHS urgent mental health guidance.
Send one message you do not have to perfect
These examples were written for this guide. Choose the one closest to what you need, or show the words on your phone.
To someone you trust: “I'm feeling really hopeless today. Could you stay with me or talk to me while I get some help?”
If explaining is difficult: “I can't put everything into words. I need support, and I don't want to deal with this alone.”
When safety is a concern: “I'm worried I might hurt myself. Please help me contact urgent support now.”
You do not have to make the message sound cheerful or apologise for needing somebody. If the first person does not answer, try another person or a support service. An unanswered message does not establish what somebody thinks of you.
Make the next step smaller
You might be facing several problems at once: money, work, health, relationships or loneliness. For this moment, choose a step that connects you to help rather than trying to solve every problem in your head.
That could mean opening the contact details for your GP, asking a trusted person to sit beside you while you call, or writing the first sentence you want the receptionist to hear. If speaking is difficult, ask what other contact methods are available.
For a GP appointment: “I've been feeling hopeless, and it's affecting my day-to-day life. I would like an appointment to talk about my mental health.”
Add how long this has been happening, any changes in sleep or everyday functioning, and whether you feel safe. You can bring notes. You do not need a diagnosis to ask for help.
While you wait for support
Choose something ordinary and manageable: sit somewhere you feel safer, have water if you want it, or ask somebody to help with the next practical task. A calming exercise is optional. If it is uncomfortable or frustrating, you can stop. It is not a test you have to pass before receiving help.
A conversation app cannot assess your safety or provide crisis care. tonen can help with wording in everyday situations, but when you feel hopeless, human support and appropriate care take priority. The words on this page are available without an app or subscription.
Frequently asked questions
No. You can describe the feeling and how it affects your day without explaining its cause.
Try: “I cannot put everything into words, but I need support today.”
No. Contact emergency or urgent mental health services when safety is a concern.