A conversation script is wording you can adapt for a request, question or limit. It can be a note to read, a message to send or a prompt to use with another communication method. Choose the sentence that serves your purpose; you do not have to memorise it or deliver it in a particular voice.
These ten examples were written by the tonen team. They are not user testimonials, captured app outputs or scripts endorsed by unnamed clinicians. Wording can clarify what you mean, but it cannot guarantee agreement, prevent overwhelm or improve a medical outcome.
1. Ask for a workload decision
Main line: “I can finish the report or take the new task today. Which should I prioritise?”
If the answer is unclear: “I cannot commit to both. Could you confirm the priority and what can move?”
Replace the tasks and timing with your actual capacity. Do not offer to work late unless you intend to. The request-declining guide gives more ways to state a limit.
2. Prepare a healthcare question
Main line: “I've been having difficulty starting everyday tasks such as cooking. I'd like to discuss what might be contributing to it.”
Follow-up: “What information would help you assess this, and what should happen next?”
Describe your own experience and its timing rather than replacing it with a diagnosis from an article. A prepared note can hold your questions; it does not make an assessment more accurate or determine treatment. Ask the service about communication support you need.
3. Decline a family plan
Main line: “Thank you for inviting me. I cannot come to the gathering.”
Optional alternative: “I would like a shorter visit another day. Would Saturday morning work?”
Keep the alternative only if you want to offer it. You do not need to disclose a health condition or promise another visit to make a refusal valid.
Would a prepared sentence help? tonen can help.
tonen offers conversation scripts, Reply Helper, Perspective Helper, Debrief, Phone Call Mode and Calm Kit. Start with 21 free scripts on iPhone. Optional Premium unlocks more features.
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4. Invite someone without assuming the answer
Main line: “Would you like to meet for coffee on Tuesday afternoon?”
If it does not suit them: “No problem. Let me know if you want to suggest another time.”
Choose the activity and contact method that work for you. A specific invitation leaves a question to answer, not an obligation to accept. Our conversation-opening guide includes other starting points.
5. Ask for a pause or help
Main line: “I cannot process more information right now. Please give me a moment.”
Specific support request: “Could you write down the next step and wait while I read it?”
You can agree with someone you trust how a saved phrase should be used. Do not assume a phrase will remain accessible during distress or replace a care or emergency plan. The overwhelm guide offers more optional wording.
6. Ask about learning support
Main line: “Written instructions would help me refer back to the task. Could you send them after the session?”
To ask about the process: “Who should I contact about support for this course, and what information do they need?”
This is example wording, not a promise of a particular adjustment or entitlement. Ask the relevant service how its arrangements work.
7. Explain a preference in a relationship
Main line: “I find last-minute changes difficult to organise. Could we check with each other before changing our plans?”
To protect private information: “I'd prefer to explain the practical request without discussing my diagnosis.”
You decide what to disclose. Another person's response depends on their choices as well as your wording.
8. Discuss a disagreement
Main line: “When the time changed, I had already booked transport. I'd like us to agree how to confirm plans.”
Pause line: “I need to stop for now. Could we check later about a workable time or format to continue?”
A pause does not have to fit a fixed calming time. The relationship conflict guide discusses requests and follow-up. A joint conversation is not the answer to every situation involving fear or control.
9. Ask for support during a difficult change
Main line: “I'm going through something difficult and do not want to explain it all. Would you be able to help with shopping this week?”
If you want company instead: “Could you sit with me for a while? I do not need advice right now.”
Name the support you want without implying that another person must provide it. You can change the request as your circumstances change.
10. State a communication preference
Main line: “I communicate more easily in writing. Please send the question so I can answer it that way.”
If you want to disclose: “I'm autistic, and written instructions are useful for me.”
Disclosure is optional. The neurodivergent communication guide offers context without defining one communication style for a whole group.
Check and choose your wording
Read the draft in a format that suits you. Remove invented reasons, apologies you do not mean and commitments you cannot make. You may shorten it, change the tone, use AAC or ask someone for help. Rehearsal is optional, and spontaneity is not the goal.
We make tonen, an iPhone app with prepared scripts and wording suggestions. The scripts feature guide explains access and limits. These website examples illustrate choices; they are not a claim that the app contains the exact sentences or can control a conversation's outcome.